I guess that in certain respects
I am not self evident.
That I try to shy away from the "I"
Not because the "we" is all that better.
But it shields "we" and creates a canvas.
That we all can drop a pollock'd smear to,
and it is random and chaotic,
but holds a sense of meaning to those
who need to hide like that.
What's the word I'm looking for?
Rationalization. That's it.
That's the ticket.
Chaos of random atoms and particles ramming into each other.
We know exactly how it happens, and why.
But, I miss faith. I need to remember that "we" is not a dirty
word, words, for fear.
When we were younger, I left you.
About month ago you did the same.
I'm sorry about the first one,
but not soo much the second time.
Not sure if you are coming back.
But even if you did, I'm not answering the door.
Just like I should have drove by the diner,
Just like you should of left him,
Just if you wanted to continue being
the person you wanted to be,
you shouldn't have asked and accepted
what I said. You said it made sense,
then you were gone!
Gone, I gave my two weeks, and even if you
showed up at my door right now, not.
Probably not. No issues abstracted,
one resolved.
I read that book,
and it bored the hell outta me.
Just as I hope it does to you, soon.
I'm starting to hear Aaron Copeland
all around me,
in the streets and in the rain that is replacing
snow.
In the conversations that I have
while I wander around downtown on my lunch
and wonder where our city went,
and why you moved to the country.
But in no way is this my justification.
You don't need one, you knew from the start.
But those are just wonderments,
not digestible to you.
and I don't need to bring them
into the future, I'll let 'em live in the past.
Just like this should've remained.
